Sex hungry ASSHOLES

I've recently been trying out this online dating scene. I have met so many men lately, gone on dates...well not dates exactly. I guess it's a new day. These days you just meet up and mess around! I'm learning that really is only good for one night then you want more, except all you meet are sex hungry assholes. They get what they want from you, no call or text the next day. OH and if you don't meet that type you meet the type that would like to name your babies before you even meet. They claim to already be in love with you yet they barely know you. I think they just love the feeling of having someone. The idea of being in love. Is it that hard to just meet someone and do things the normal way? Go on a date and have great conversation, if it leads to more great! If not, that's ok. I would love to just meet a nice guy who wants to get to know me and have fun. Someone who still has goals for themselves but could take on a relationship or at least give it a chance.

I've had fun the past couple weeks but I'm not in any way satisfied with my results. I'm starting to feel like if men are online they must be looking to get laid. Even though I would hate to assume all men are that way, it's turning out to be true. I'm really hoping something will change my feelings on this. I'll keep this updated. There has to be a great guy in South Florida somewhere.

Emily & Jane

Chapter 1:The Beginning

Meeting at a club for the first time, Emily and Jane brought together for one of Jane's cousins birthday in lovely Washington D.C. No idea who each other were just that they have mutual friends. They didn't think they would end up being so close with more in common than they both realized. One big similarity being their love lives! They went out to this club which Jane had got all of her cousins friends on the guest list it was going to be a great birthday celebration. Everyone met up at this club and it was turning out to be fun night. Hip Hop playing on one floor, Techno on the downstairs; Jane ended up losing everyone in the club that night and finally found Emily and her group she came with. A few guys one being the worst male ever to fall in to Janes life. That is a whole other chapter I'll save for later!

 Jane ended up spending most the night with Emily and they partied all night long because everyone else was lost in the club or had left. They exchanged names to find each other on Facebook, took lots of pictures and danced the night away. The next day they found each other on Facebook and ended up talking for hours! Jane learned Emily was from Germany and recently came to the states, really into art, Techno music, and Love. To Jane it was like meeting her German twin. Looking at the pictures from the night before Jane realized she met people last night that would have a greater affect on her life than she ever thought. Emily was going through some guy troubles and so was Jane it brought them together and would end up being a common theme with these two ladies. A friendship blossoming from nothing, and that is only the beginning!

Maryland to Florida

As of June of 2010 I am now a Florida resident.I moved all the way from Maryland and now I'm a baby to cold weather! I do like it here, but it wasn't an easy road and I'm still on that same road trying to get off and have things settle down. I decided to move to Florida after a few events...meaning a few fights with my mother which I think we all have but they say distance can help a relationship so I thought maybe it's time for me to get out on my own or at least somewhat on my own. I was searching for a little independence from my life as I knew it. Let's see I lived with my mom, worked with my mom...with her all the time but never made decisions for myself without being worried what her opinion was. I will say I have gained a lot of respect for my mother. She is one of the strongest woman I know, she raised my sister and I living paycheck to paycheck but always made sure we had food on the table GOOD FOOD! My mother is an amazing cook. I plan on stealing her recipes because when I someday get married I wanna be able to cook for my husband some of those meals. She always made sure we had nice clothes and anything we needed. I hope now that were both out of the house she can pamper herself some. I would love to give back to her in the future, right now may not be the best time.

Getting back to my life here in Florida well it's nothing as I thought it would be. Some good things and some I hope change soon. I'm still unemployed, I have filled out numerous applications and nothing comes up. I'm getting worried and stressed out. I am racking up debt to Verizon...Ha...and I'm so stressed out. I'm trying to go to school but it's always something. Now they say I have to pay for my materials and my grant won't cover it at first. I want to go to cosmetology school but I have to come up with money for the books and uniform...WELL...Can't do that without a job. I'm trying so hard I'm doing everything I have to do...Hell I'm not even being picky, I would work at McDonald's if I had to but even they weren't hiring except for a manager and well...managing a fast food restaurant not something I would be good at. That isn't selling myself short that is just being honest. I applied at a new Mexican place called Tijuana Flats really good food. They just opened yesterday so I filled out an application I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Besides work comes love and my love life is on a roller coaster as well. I met a guy when I first moved here who I've grown to like a lot...may I even say I love him and I really can't explain why because were NOT together...he says were taking it day by day. I'm not sure what is keeping me around? I think it's the fact that he has treated me the best out of any guy I've ever been with. He told me he doesn't have time for a girlfriend because of school. He is going to school to be a respiratory therapist, works at the hospital and has another job. I guess he is busy but I have friends just as busy who make their relationships work so sometimes it's hard to buy into that excuse. All my friends tell me to leave him alone but when I see him it's great. All my friends say he is loving this no title relationship because he can do what he wants and I'm still there. Maybe they're right, I just don't understand why he won't make it official. We talk everyday, he worries when I go out if I'm gonna be with other guys, he freaked out on me last weekend because I crashed at another guys place! Mind you this guy is like family and his girlfriend was there with us. He does all the sensual stuff when were together...kisses all over not just making out, he holds me and it's not all about sex! I think it will either end with me finding another guy or me getting with another guy and him finding out and him accusing me of cheating and I just end it. That is my love life. Not pretty at all.

I'm on this crazy journey and I have myself to rely on and I'm finding out so many things about myself that I never knew. Some good some bad and some ugly. I'm learning to accept what I cannot change because I could have done things differently. In the end it all lead me here to Florida to this day and to this moment and I'd like to believe there is a reason for everything. A picture of Miami from when I first moved here. :)